To Work or Not to Work

 There is a quote that's doing the rounds in social media

"20 years from now, the only people who remember that you worked late are your kids"

The quote is intended to dissuade people from overworking, to urge people not to make work their only gig in life. I get that. 

I do believe, though, that work you do has to be meaningful. And when work is meaningful, you do tend to go deep. Very often, you do so without a sense of time. Maria Montessori argued that children as young as three years immerse themselves in real work for long hours, and become irritable when they are taken away from the work. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi echoes a similar sentiment in his seminal work "Flow" - when the level of complexity of the work you do matches, or slightly exceeds, the level of competence you have, you are in a state of "flow", a state where productivity is high and fatigue is low, and creativity and satisfaction out of the work you do is attained. (I am paraphrasing based on books I read at different points in time, some over fifteen years ago)

Cal Newport, in his book, Deep Work, argues for creating structures and routines that regularly enable one to get into a state of flow and to do what he calls deep work, a necessary condition to break new ground, produce something that did not exist before. And this effort is necessary at one extreme to move the world forward, and at the other extreme, crucial for survival, in the world where AI poses a real threat to jobs as we understand them today.

I quote all of these great researchers and thought leaders to drive home some ideas about work. One, work creates a sense of purpose and is essential for existence as well as sanity for most people. Two, for that reason one should always strive for meaningful work. Three, when work is meaningful it will eat into other aspects of life. I argue therefore, that working hard is not only unavoidable, but also essential not only for the larger benefit, but also for one's own. 

How then do you balance work with relationships, family, self-care, and all the good stuff? I argue for long term balance. In a narrow timeframe, you will find that one aspect occupies a disproportionate share of time and mindspace. At another narrow timeframe, you will find a similar pattern, but with with a different aspect of your life. 

Can we find a way to maintain long-term balance between everything that is meaningful and demands time, attention, energy and love? Part of doing that is acknowledging that there are areas of your life that you are possibly not paying a lot of attention to at a given point of time, and giving yourself grace for it.